Month: April 2017

AN UNMERITED GIFT OF GRACE TO ENTER INTO THE DIVINE MERCY

When my parents dropped me off I said, “Turn the car around. I’m not staying here overnight.”

For the record, whenever you are about to encounter a great good, there’s always a force to pull you back into yourself. In my case whenever I’m leaping forward in the spiritual realm, the dust really kicks up. Thankfully, with time, I can see the signs of this warfare and can actually plan for it, but in my early days, I couldn’t recognize this little battle within myself. The enemy doesn’t want our growth into truth but wants to isolate us and keep us in the dark. This weekend was going to be God’s unmerited gift of grace to enter into his Divine Mercy.

Despite my mini meltdown, at seventeen my faith was exploding. My parents were dropping me off at my first overnight retreat as a high school senior and it was simple and profound. I had strong faith that drew me to the Sacraments, a rapidly blossoming prayer life and Marian devotion, but to share it so openly with others who believed was truly life changing. It made me vulnerable. It made me aware of the power of the community. The friendships that forged and the new aspects of what being the Body of Christ meant, really shaped all the days to follow. Let’s face it. If you don’t have anyone to walk with, it can be a lonely journey on the narrow road of faith, AMIRIGHT?

Thank God my parents in their goodness told me to give it a night and see. I soon forgot about the parking lot drama upon arrival as well as my parents as soon as I was immersed into a weekend retreat full of fun, the power of God, prayer, the Sacraments of the Church, and in a profound way – new friendships – the type of people who would teach, instruct and simply walk with you on your journey of faith.

Kate was my roommate on this overnight retreat and just a year ahead of me as a freshman at Merrimack College. She was part of the leadership team. I was a Framingham kid and she was a north shore girl from Malden. We were roomed together in this old convent and never slept because we stayed up all night sharing everything about ourselves. She already knew she was going to be a lawyer and I already knew I was going to work in television. We talked all night about our family lives, our faith walk, career dreams, desire for boyfriends and eventual husbands – and were amazed at the ease in which we connected and the juxtaposition of our teen selves pouring our hearts out across twin beds at this moment in time. She became a big sister in the faith to me and was very much God sent.

After our Quincy weekend, Kate and I kept up our fast forging friendship all through college and young adult life. I would borrow a car to meet her half way in Boston, Quincy or I would ride up to Malden as I was enamored with her huge Irish family and amazing brothers and sisters. I later joined the retreat team and all through college we had special continual formation weekends with amazing priests and other young adult leaders and married couples. We led weekend retreats delivering faith and sharing our testimony to high school teens from around the Archdiocese of Boston. One of these late nights sitting in her parked car talking, praying together – Kate taught me the Divine Mercy chaplet and spoke to me about this devotion. How come I never heard of this? The Divine Mercy now, and especially then, circa 1990, was a rather new devotion in the Church and though on the rise had not made a permanent fixture into parishes and dioceses until Pope John Paul became its chief herald.

Jesus appeared to a Polish nun, now saint Maria Faustina Kowalska of the Blessed Sacrament, OLM in 1931. Sister Faustina wrote in her diary that on the night of Sunday, February 22, 1931, while she was in her convent cell, Jesus appeared to her as the “King of Divine Mercy” wearing a white garment with red and pale rays emanating from his heart. Read more here.

What is the chaplet? You pray the Divine Mercy chaplet on your Rosary beads and pray the Our Father, Hail Mary and the Creed and then on the big bead “Eternal Father, I offer you the Body, Blood, Soul and Divinity of your dearly beloved Son, Our Lord Jesus Christ, in atonement for our sins and those of the whole world.” And on the little beads x 10 you pray, “Have mercy on us and on the whole world.” In conclusion you pray 3 times, “Holy God, Holy Mighty One, Holy Immortal One, Have Mercy on us and on the whole world (Diary 476).” We prayed it right then and there.

Jesus said to Saint Faustina, “Unceasingly recite this chaplet that I have taught you. Whoever will recite it will receive great mercy at the hour of death..Priests will recommend it to sinners as their last hope of salvation. Even the most hardened sinner, if he recites this chaplet even once, will receive grace from My infinite mercy (687) …Oh, what great graces will I grant to souls who recite this chaplet (848)…Through the chaplet you will obtain anything, if what you ask is compatible with My will (1731).. I want the whole world to know My infinite mercy. I want to give unimaginable graces to those who trust in My mercy (687).”

Grace. Great graces. Infinite Mercy. Obtain anything. Unimaginable graces. Trust in My mercy.

The message of Divine Mercy, is truly profound and it really attracted me because of my Polish heritage. I began to read the Diary of Saint Faustina, to whom God revealed his message of mercy and study what it meant. Jesus revealed his message of mercy through a simple Polish nun and all of this recorded revelation – all approved by the Catholic Church (after scrutiny and investigation) is available in the her Diary. This blossoming devotion led us to spend time at the Western Massachusetts National Shrine of Divine Mercy  in Stockbridge – a place of extraordinary grace and blessing right in our New England back yard.

Tomorrow, the first Sunday after Easter is the Sunday that the Church designates each year as Divine Mercy Sunday. Churches around the world will have celebrations and devotions in honor of the Divine Mercy, which will include the recitation of the Divine Mercy Chaplet, Eucharistic Holy Hours, the reading of excerpts from the Divine Mercy diary, veneration of the image of Divine Mercy and perhaps in some special places include veneration of the relic of Saint Faustina.

Jesus told Saint Faustina, “At three o’clock, implore my mercy, especially for sinners and if only for a brief moment, immerse yourself in My Passion, particularly in My abandonment at the moment of agony. This is the hour of great mercy. In this hour, I will refuse nothing to the soul that makes a request of Me in virtue of my Passion.” OK that right there is BOSS! Let me repeat what Jesus is saying to you and to me:

I WILL REFUSE NOTHING TO THE SOUL THAT MAKES A REQUEST OF ME IN VIRTUE OF MY PASSION.

We can immerse ourselves at 3 o’clock each day (I call it the hour of power), but on the day where we celebrate Divine Mercy Sunday there are extraordinary graces and I implore you to stop everything and enter in. Even if you have never participated in this devotion, enter in for yourself, your family and the knots in your life. I promise you, you will not be the same.

What are the key elements of Divine Mercy?

• Ask Jesus for His Mercy (by prayer, repentance) and ask him to pour His mercy on us and the whole world (if you have not been to confession in a while – even years – this is important – don’t be afraid, but let God undo those knots and visit confession this weekend if you can)
• Be Merciful: God wants us to receive it and share it (share the message of mercy and share his love and forgiveness)
• Trust!! God wants us to trust in Him – the more we trust, the more He can do for us. Jesus, I trust in You!

I don’t know if I ever would have received the Divine Mercy message as soon or as profound if not in the parked car with Kate that night. Would I have answered something from a church bulletin in the same way as a teenager? Like Kate, I want to be your friend of mercy. If you have never heard of this devotion, consider this a turning point for you to enter in. If you recall this devotion and have waned, consider this a re-entry. I want to teach you how to pray this chaplet and invite you to this profound aspect of our faith that opens to us an ocean of His Mercy that is transforming for our lives and the whole world. I want to encourage you to immerse your life, your sins, your failures, your shortcomings, your longings, your sickness, your wounds, your pain, your family, your dreams and your destiny deep into His ocean of Divine Mercy. When Jesus was upon the Cross and his side was lanced, the Blood and Water poured forth as an ocean of Mercy for you and for me. This ocean of Mercy is transformative. I encourage you to stand underneath His side and receive all that he has for you. And then, go out and be a friend of mercy to someone who needs this message.

Jesus, Mercy, Jesus – we trust in You.

Praying for you, my sweet friends+

Lexi

JMJ

I NEVER WANT TO FORGET WHERE I STOOD ON APRIL 2, 2005

I still don’t know how I ever made it. Grace is like that.

It was the end of March 2005 and I was on a two week vacation in Palm Beach with my family begging, “Pope, please live. Please, live a few more days.”

I desperately needed a few more days off and a mental and physical break from the frenetic pace of my 24/7 newsroom life where, for the most part, the days bled into each other. I had a ton of “comp” days from working through Boston breaking news events of the year and was chilling down around the pool enjoying the sunshiny monotony of vacation days before it was too late to cash in the time.

In the previous several months, Associated Press was constantly breaking news on Pope John Paul II’s failing health, something I knew was imminent as a newswoman but as a Catholic daughter of his Pontificate that spanned my entire life, I didn’t ever want to consider Catholicism without him.

Every time the AP alerts chimed on my desktop, I started to go through our Pope death plan and a subsequent prospective travel fire drill that had me reorganizing a designated suitcase with just enough toothpaste, suits, and pajamas that ultimately would never be worn as we would never change outfits or sleep except for a 10 minutes here or there on the floor of the NBC workspace. The AP breaking updates would ping, we’d make some calls to sources and check flights. Papa would rally. Rinse and repeat.

Everyone has that squad at work that keeps you informed – even on your vacation. In a newsroom environment, put that loyalty on speed dial and it’s a daily read in with the 411. While I was around the pool, I was getting calls from those colleagues about how this time it was “different” and “maybe you should fly back.” The word at the Vatican was that the pope was in really grave condition. The news director called and told me that he wanted me to get on the next flight back because our designated Papal crew was getting booked on the next flights out of Boston to Rome.

I remember I had one night left to scramble and get everything together that I would need for international breaking news travel. I’d been there multiple times before for work and personal trips, but the suddenness and geographic maze was a complete fire drill. I was not ready. I was not home in Boston. I did not have my passport. I only had flip flops and casual clothes and needed to get to the mall to scoop up a few serious outfits and sturdy shoes that would handle what could be weeks on standing feet covering his death, funeral and coverage of Pope John Paul II’s successor.

My mom drove me to the little Palm Beach International airport and somehow I missed the first flight out. That NEVER happens. I started to pray and said, “God if I’m going, you have to make a way. This other plane barely will land on time for me to make the connection. I can’t worry about this. Either you are sending me or not. I’m surrendering this.” My mother hung with me until I made a run for the next flight and we prayed together.

No one had a key to my little house except the landlord who was out of town. My passport was in a purse hanging on my bedroom door in the zipped interior pocket. The ninja newsroom assignment desk arranged for the news director’s assistant to cab to my house (pre Uber you guys), and as she reluctantly rode to my seaside Winthrop cottage, I was giving  instructions for a breaking and entering through the kitchen window. The Pope was about to die, I was in an emergency travel situation and I didn’t care if my place had a broken window for the duration. It was THIS crazy and more, “Tell her to get one of the outdoor pieces of furniture, climb up, cut the screen window with keys, climb in – she will fit – and when she is in there, there is a park bench piece of furniture to catch her. Then go to my bedroom and the passport is in my purse hanging on the door.” It was like Holly Hunter from Broadcast News meets Holly Hunter from The Firm. It got done. God bless this young woman forever.

My dad wasn’t with us in Florida and he met me when I landed in Boston. He went to the news station to grab my passport from the break-in, my Pope folder of sources and contacts, and the travel cash that we would need for the trip to hand off to me as if we were in some sort of Spartan race. I just remember running and running and running until I made it through international security. On the other side, I met with our team and we were all hugs and smiles that we were ready to be wheels up. It was a literal miracle.

With all the logistical hurdles, we were already in breaking news mode. I didn’t expect that we would actually get to the Vatican and the Holy Father would still be alive. It was truly God’s grace to make it in time to be one of the first in St. Peter’s Square while our beloved Papa was still with us.  Our team connected with NBC where the network had their live location space right on the ground level until we would later be positioned on a nearby roof for the duration of the continuous coverage. We hooked up with the network bureau, Rome correspondents, former Ambassador Ray Flynn and other thought leaders like George Weigel who were all piling in to be part of history.

It was April and freezing cold in Rome. A coat was left off the mall scramble list of must-haves in my last minute shopping spree. We shook off the cold as best we could as we stood in the square and observed the people coming in one by one and later in streams. The Holy Father was drifting, but still with us. We were there. We were praying for him. Observing. Talking to people, hearing their stories and what compelled them to urgently come to St. Peter’s and stand in vigil. A compulsion that we shared in our own professional “pilgrimage” to be positioned beneath the Papal apartments with the people. Before his death on April 1st Pope John Paul II said, “I have looked for you. Now you have come to me. And I thank you.” This was the essence of the return of the love he poured out on the entire world, God’s love. God’s passion. God’s pursuit. God’s constant presence. The swell of people who came in droves to make a return to the one who called them, spoke of God’s love to them, cajoled them, was epic. The Church was alive and not dead. Love was responding to love. The emotions were like nothing I’ve experienced with grief and love intertwined.

We’d work. Quietly reflect. Observe. Point out observations to each other. It was the calm before the absolute crush of humanity that descended upon the square as far as the eye could see which culminated on the day of his funeral.

I’ve never felt emotion like what I felt when the announcement of his passing was made. It was 9:37 p.m. The bells began to toll. To be standing there so close to his window where we stood below many times before in the same square experiencing his many Wednesday audiences, the canonization of St. Edith Stein and the Jubilee 2000.  I first experienced his Papacy up close as a teenager at World Youth Day in Denver. I covered his United States Papal visits as a journalist and now this-  this momentous full circle moment in time seemed to stand still. Immediately at the passing, doves flew to the Pope’s window almost like a signal and then up to the sky. We marveled at creation’s response in this moment.

As he passed, I believe so much grace was imparted. I know I received it. My life changed forever after this experience. It was as though the old was passing and the new was coming. He showed the world how to live and how to die. He brought the Gospel to the ends of the earth as the Vicar of Christ on earth. And he also showed us how to embrace every ski slope, every stage, every man or woman of good will, every baby, the sick, the forgotten, the young from all over the world, the sinner, the poor, the wealthy, athletes, the aged, the unborn, other saints, the Eucharist and the blessed Mother. He taught about family, friendship, and authentic love between a man and a woman. He lived his life to the full, proclaiming forever the name of Jesus, up until he could not breathe one more breath.

A year after his passing, I was in Rome again. I was working for the Diocese of Palm Beach and traveling on vacation with Fr. Benedict Groeschel on a little pilgrimage through Italy. I went a few days early to enjoy private time in Rome and heard that there was a huge Polish celebration of Pope John Paul II’s life and that Fr. Stan Fortuna from Fr. Benedict’s order, the Franciscan Friars of the Renewal, would be performing as part of this gala event. I contacted Fr. Stan and to our amazement, he got us primo front row seats to this blessed occasion. It’s was a huge Polish scene that was broadcast live on Polish television. JP2s peeps and a few American priests (episcopal secretaries to Bishops) and us. (Thank you Fr. Stan!)

I actually may not have fully grieved his death until a year later because I worked right through it. This Polish remembrance crystalized everything about Saint John Paul II and gave us all time to process the loss, the legacy and how we were being called forward. It was deeply moving and we wept as if his death was the day before. It still hurt. There is a rap song that Fr. Stan wrote and performed about JP2 that you may have heard. It’s called “I’m loving you.”  He nails it. Imagine this swank Polish event and then introducing “the American priest, Fr. Stan Fortuna” who in his Franciscan garb and dreads rapped this ode to our hero in full street Jazz – all soul.  You can listen to it here. Here’s one verse I want to leave you with as we remember his passing – the passing of Saint John Paul II, the Great.

In the first days that you was gone

There was a void in my heart, dark like the 

dawn

There you was helping me not to be 

withdrawn

Pushing me to move on with energy, 

purpose and determination, like you been

With the courage and the heroes of the Polish nation

With no hesitation, you went deep into the greatness of your vocation

I’m loving you

Another thing that this Pope did and did well was connect his kids. My dear friend Paul George and I were both in Denver for World Youth Day 1993. We both had profound experiences. If you are part of the JP2 generation and are feeling nostalgic, take a listen to my appearance on The Paul George show here. We talk about JP2, Denver and where we are now.

John Paul II, we love you! Saint John Paul II, pray for us!

Praying for you+

Lexi

JMJ